I will do my best to keep her at home and look after her myself, hopefully with the help of her other four children!

Although those intentions are good, it may not be practical if her medical condition deteriorated to a point where we were unable to accommodate her needs.

WHY do I feel this way?

I trained in geriatric nursing nearly 25 years ago, where I received excellent training and I have had a passion for nursing all these years, and now after being employed in acute care settings, I have returned in the past 5 years to Aged Care Nursing, doing the "hard yards on the floor". It is quite a difference to "the old days".

After working in some “hell holes” of places, two years ago I began work at an extra services aged care facility. The rooms resemble that of a "very nice motel" having a mini refrigerator, microwave, TV, state of the art electric beds that lower and raise, lovely doona covers and matching drapes, own ensuite, built in wardrobes, as well as beautiful furniture and fittings, big lounges and dining rooms, balconies, the promise of extra and excellent care, chef prepared meals etc. make this a very impressive looking and inviting nursing home.

This facility is private. To be able to secure a permanent room here and the services promised, you will need deep pockets to pay for the pleasure, including a hefty bond payment. In other words – you cannot come here and live permanently on a pension and let the government pay for it through funding – you will need to come up with approx. $1,000 per week – possibly more for some rooms – possibly a little less – but you won’t get much change if any from the $1,000 a week. One may have to sell up the home or assets to be able to afford such accommodation and services. If you require nursing care, depending on the level of care you require, the facility can and will apply for funding from the government. It will all depend on your needs as to what category of nursing is required thus the funding paid will depend on this.

The following satirical piece was written by a nurse aid with nursing home experience in the Australian aged care market. It drives home the fact that the residents in many homes are cared for by people whose prime interest is the money they can squeeze from the care of the residents. Others have called it "wrinkle ranching".

It gives a view of the system from a disgusted worker at the bottom of the pile - one with little chance of changing the system. It needs no further introduction. For obvious reasons the name of the author is withheld and forgotten.

[in response to article published in "The Bulletin": "Broken Trust" - A system in crisis: How aged care is falling apart The Bulletin's special investigation reveals a system failing the aged and their families. By Julie-Anne Davies.]

Subject: "I am glad people are stating to take notice - it could be us one day."

"My dear mother-in-law passed away 18 months ago aged 92. I felt that I had to go every day to supervise her care. So many things happened, little things and big things in the end I became so exhausted just trying to keep on top of all the problems that would arise. Most of the staff are wonderful but understaffing is a real problem and there is often only one trained sister in the evening to up to 100 or more residents.

My mother was born in New Zealand of Australian parents. She was abandoned at about four, then looked after by an aunt and her husband. Although she nominally attended school, she spent much time working in their hotel, then later working in the fields on their farm. She had no possessions of her own until she married my father at 36 and then had two children. She moved from Western Australia to Victoria in 1952 and lived in service premises until 1956, then lived in the house her husband built until she died in July 2000.

She was very small (about 5 ft and around 40 kg) but generally enjoyed reasonably good health. In 1982 she found a lump on her breast on a Monday, saw her doctor on Tuesday and was admitted to hospital on Thursday. After a biopsy on Friday morning, she had a radical mastectomy and was back in the ward before lunch. On the Saturday morning her specialist could not find her, as she was walking around the hospital with her "drip and drain" visiting those patients who were ill!

In 1987, when her husband was ill, dying from the complications of diabetes, she was unable to care for him at home. There were not only the physical problems of trying to move a person at least double her weight, but the emotions of trying to care for someone with a constant need for medication and twice-daily injections.

We applied for Home Care through the local council, but a waiting list of over two months meant that it could only be delivered too late. He was admitted to hospital, but after a week or so discharged himself. Back home, my mother still was unable to look after him, there was no other care available at short notice and although I visited and did what I could, it was not satisfactory.

On many occasions my father tried to pursue euthanasia, and I am ashamed to admit that I was too much of a coward to help him. So after a few more weeks, he went back into hospital, in a room with four walls and no window, and undergoing so many blood tests that he was unable to hold a paper or book. So he had no pleasure open to him. He died in agony, under conditions which would cause outcry under other situations. I resolved that would not happen again.